Five Dozen Great Poems

for Father's Day


Father's Day Poem 1
AuthorshipYou say that father write a lot of books, but what he write I don'tunderstand.He was reading to you all the evening, but could you reallymake out what he meant?What nice stores, mother, you can tell us! Why can't fatherwrite like that, I wonder?Did he never hear from his own mother stories of giants andfairies and princesses?Has he forgotten them all?Often when he gets late for his bath you have to and call himan hundred times.You wait and keep his dishes warm for him, but he goes onwriting and forgets.Father always plays at making books.If ever I go to play in father's room, you come and call me,"What a naughty child!"If I make the slightest noise you say, "Don't you see thatfather's at his work?"What's the fun of always writing and writing?When I take up father's pen or pencil and write upon his bookjust as he does,-a,b,c,d,e,f,g,h,i,-why do you get cross with methen, mother?You never say a word when father writes.When my father wastes such heaps of paper, mother, you don'tseem to mind at all.But if I take only one sheet to take a boat with, you say,"Child, how troublesome you are!"What do you think of father's spoiling sheets and sheets ofpaper with black marks all over both sides?
Rabindranath Tagore

Father's Day Poem 2
IfIf you can keep your head when all about youAre losing theirs and blaming it on you;If you can trust yourself when all men doubt youBut make allowance for their doubting too;If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,Or, being hated, don’t give way to hating,And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream-and not make dreams your master;If you can think-and not make thoughts your aim;If you can meet with triumph and disasterAnd treat those two imposters just the same;If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spokenTwisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,Or watch the things you gave your life to, brokenAnd stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winningsAnd risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,And lose, and start again at your beginningsAnd never breathe a word about your loss;If you can force your heart and nerve and sinewTo serve your turn long after they are gone,And so hold on when there is nothing in youExcept the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”;
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,Or walk with kings-nor lose the common touch;If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;If all men count with you, but none too much;If you can fill the unforgiving minuteWith sixty seconds’ worth of distance run-Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,And-which is more-you’ll be a Man, my son!
Rudyard Kipling
Father's Day Poem 3
The Child Is Fatherto the Man'The child is father to the man.'How can he be? The words are wild.Suck any sense from that who can:'The child is father to the man.'No; what the poet did write ran,'The man is father to the child.''The child is father to the man!'How can he be? The words are wild.
Gerard Manley Hopkins
Father's Day Poem 4
The Little Boy Lost 'Father, father, where are you going?Oh do not walk so fast!Speak, father, speak to you little boy,Or else I shall be lost.'
The night was dark, no father was there,The child was wet with dew;The mire was deep, and the child did weep,And away the vapour flew.
William Blake

Father's Day Poem 5
My Father moved through Dooms of Love My father moved through dooms of lovethrough sames of am through haves of give,singing each morning out of each nightmy father moved through depths of height
this motionless forgetful whereturned at his glance to shining here;that if~ so timid air is firmunder his eyes would stir and squirm
newly as from unburied whichfloats the first who,his april touchdrove sleeping selves to swarm their fateswoke dreamers to their ghostly roots
and should some why completely weepmy father's fingers brought her sleep:vainly no smallest voice might cryfor he could feel the mountains grow.
Lifting the valleys of the seamy father moved through griefs of joy;praising a forehead called the moonsinging desire into begin
joy was his song and joy so purea heart of star by him could steerand pure so now and now so yesthe wrists of twilight would rejoice
keen as midsummer's keen beyondconceiving mind of sun will stand,so strictly~ over utmost himso hugely stood my father's dream
his flesh was flesh his blood was blood:no hungry man but wished him food;no cripple wouldn't creep one mileuphill to only see him smile.
Scorning the Pomp of must and shallmy father moved through dooms of feel;his anger was as right as rainhis pity was as green as grain
septembering arms of year extendyes humbly wealth to foe and friendthan he to foolish and to wiseoffered immeasurable is
proudly and~ by octobering flamebeckonedas earth will downward climb,so naked for immortal workhis shoulders marched against the dark
his sorrow was as true as bread:no liar looked him in the head;if every friend became his foehe'd laugh and build a world with snow.
My father moved through theys of we,singing each new leaf out of each tree~ and every child was sure that springdanced when she heard my father sing
then let men kill which cannot share,let blood and flesh be mud and mire,scheming imagine,passion willed,freedom a drug that's bought and sold
giving to steal and cruel kind,a heart to fear,to doubt a mind,to differ a disease of same,conform the pinnacle of am
though dull were all we taste as bright,bitter all utterly things sweet,maggoty minus and dumb deathall we inherit,all bequeath
and nothing quite so least as truth--i say though hate were why men breathe--because my Father lived his soullove is the whole and more than all
E. E. Cummings

Father's Day Poem 6
Saving a Train 'Twas in the year of 1869, and on the 19th of November,Which the people in Southern Germany will long remember,The great rain-storm which for twenty hours did pour down,That the rivers were overflowed and petty streams all around.
The rain fell in such torrents as had never been seen before,That it seemed like a second deluge, the mighty torrents' roar,At nine o'clock at night the storm did rage and moanWhen Carl Springel set out on his crutches all alone --
From the handsome little hut in which he dwelt,With some food to his father, for whom he greatly felt,Who was watching at the railway bridge,Which was built upon a perpendicular rocky ridge.
The bridge was composed of iron and wooden blocks,And crossed o'er the Devil's Gulch, an immense cleft of rocks,Two hundred feet wide and one hundred and fifty feet deep,And enough to make one's flesh to creep.
Far beneath the bridge a mountain-stream did boil and rumble,And on that night did madly toss and tumble;Oh! it must have been an awful sightTo see the great cataract falling from such a height.
It was the duty of Carl's father to watch the bridge on stormy nights,And warn the on-coming trains of danger with the red lights;So, on this stormy night, the boy Carl hobbled alongSlowly and fearlessly upon his crutches, because he wasn't strong.
He struggled on manfully with all his mightThrough the fearful darkness of the night,And half-blinded by the heavy rain,But still resolved the bridge to gain.
But when within one hundred yards of the bridge, it gave way with an awful crash,And fell into the roaring flood below, and made a fearful splash,Which rose high above the din of the storm,The like brave Carl never heard since he was born.
Then; 'Father! father!' cried Carl in his loudest tone,'Father! father!' he shouted again in very pitiful moans;But no answering voice did reply,Which caused him to heave a deep-fetched sigh.
And now to brave Carl the truth was clearThat he had lost his father dear,And he cried, 'My poor father's lost, and cannot be found,He's gone down with the bridge, and has been drowned.'
But he resolves to save the on-coming train,So every nerve and muscle he does strain,And he trudges along dauntlessly on his crutches,And tenaciously to them he clutches.
And just in time he reaches his father's carTo save the on-coming train from afar,So he seizes the red light, and swings it round,And cried with all his might, 'The bridge is down! The bridge is down!'
So forward his father's car he drives,Determined to save the passengers' lives,Struggling hard with might and main,Hoping his struggle won't prove in vain.
So on comes the iron-horse snorting and rumbling,And the mountain-torrent at the bridge kept roaring and tumbling;While brave Carl keeps shouting, 'The bridge is down! The bridge is down!'He cried with a pitiful wail and sound.
But, thank heaven, the engine-driver sees the red lightThat Carl keeps swinging round his head with all his might;But bang! bang! goes the engine with a terrible crash,And the car is dashed all to smash.
But the breaking of the car stops the train,And poor Carl's struggle is not in vain;But, poor soul, he was found stark dead,Crushed and mangled from foot to head!
And the passengers were all loud in Carl's praise,And from the cold wet ground they did him raise,And tears for brave Carl fell silently around,Because he had saved two hundred passengers from being drowned.
In a quiet village cemetery he now sleeps among the silent dead,In the south of Germany, with a tombstone at his head,Erected by the passengers he saved in the train,And which to his memory will long remain.
William Topaz McGonagall
Father's Day Poem 7
Sweet And Low Sweet and low, sweet and low,Wind of the western sea,Low, low, breathe and blow,Wind of the western sea!Over the rolling waters go,Come from the dying moon, and blow,Blow him again to me;While my little one, while my pretty one, sleeps.
Sleep and rest, sleep and rest,Father will come to thee soon;Rest, rest, on mother's breast,Father will come to thee soon;Father will come to his babe in the best,Silver sails all out of the west,Under the silver moon:Sleep, my little one, sleep, my pretty one, sleep.
Alfred Lord Tennyson
Father's Day Poem 8
Death and the Lady Turn in, my lord, she said ;As it were the Father of SinI have hated the Father of the Dead,The slayer of my kin ;By the Father of the Living led,Turn in, my lord, turn in.
We were foes of old ; thy touch was cold,But mine is warm as life ;I have struggled and made thee loose thy hold,I have turned aside the knife.Despair itself in me was bold,I have striven, and won the strife.
But that which conquered thee and roseAgain to earth descends ;For the last time we have come to blows.And the long combat ends.The worst and secretest of foes,Be now my friend of friends.
Mary Elizabeth Coleridge

Father's Day Poem 9
God Gave To Me A Child In Part GOD gave to me a child in part,Yet wholly gave the father's heart:Child of my soul, O whither now,Unborn, unmothered, goest thou?
You came, you went, and no man wist;Hapless, my child, no breast you kist;On no dear knees, a privileged babbler, clomb,Nor knew the kindly feel of home.
My voice may reach you, O my dear-A father's voice perhaps the child may hear;And, pitying, you may turn your viewOn that poor father whom you never knew.
Alas! alone he sits, who then,Immortal among mortal men,Sat hand in hand with love, and all day throughWith your dear mother wondered over you.
Robert Louis Stevenson
Father's Day Poem 10
The Wicked Postman Why do you sit there on the floor so quiet and silent, tell me,mother dear?The rain is coming in through the open window, making you allwet, and you don't mind it.Do you hear the gong striking four? It is time for my brotherto come home from school.What has happened to you that you look so strange?Haven't you got a letter from father today?I saw the postman bringing letters in his bag for almosteverybody in the town.Only father's letters he keeps to read himself. I am sure thepostman is a wicked man.But don't be unhappy about that, mother dear.Tomorrow is market day in the next village. You ask your maidto buy some pens and papers.I myself will write all father's letters; you will not finda single mistake.I shall write from A right up to K.But, mother, why do you smile?You don't believe that I can write as nicely as father does!But I shall rule my paper carefully, and write all the lettersbeautifully big.When I finish my writing do you think I shall be so foolishas father and drop it into the horrid postman's bag?I shall bring it to you myself without waiting, and letter byletter help you to read my writing.I know the postman does not like to give you the really niceletters.
Rabindranath Tagore
Father's Day Poem 11
Hymn 123 ~ The Repenting Prodigal
Luke 15:13,etc.
Behold the wretch whose lust and wineHad wasted his estate,He begs a share among the swine,To taste the husks they eat!
"I die with hunger here," he cries,"I starve in foreign lands;My father's house has large suppliesAnd bounteous are his hands.
"I'll go, and with a mournful tongueFall down before his face,-Father, I've done thy justice wrong,Nor can deserve thy grace."
He said, and hastened to his home,To seek his father's love;The father saw the rebel come,And all his bowels move.
He ran, and fell upon his neck,Embraced and kissed his son;The rebel's heart with sorrow brakeFor follies he had done.
"Take off his clothes of shame and sin,"The father gives command,"Dress him in garments white and clean,With rings adorn his hand.
"A day of feasting I ordain,Let mirth and joy abound;My son was dead, and lives again,Was lost, and now is found."
Isaac Watts
Father's Day Poem 12
Father Death Blues ~ Don't Grow Old,Part V Hey Father Death, I'm flying homeHey poor man, you're all aloneHey old daddy, I know where I'm going
Father Death, Don't cry any moreMama's there, underneath the floorBrother Death, please mind the store
Old Aunty Death Don't hide your bonesOld Uncle Death I hear your groansO Sister Death how sweet your moans
O Children Deaths go breathe your breathsSobbing breasts'll ease your DeathsPain is gone, tears take the rest
Genius Death your art is doneLover Death your body's goneFather Death I'm coming home
Guru Death your words are trueTeacher Death I do thank youFor inspiring me to sing this Blues
Buddha Death, I wake with youDharma Death, your mind is newSangha Death, we'll work it through
Suffering is what was bornIgnorance made me forlornTearful truths I cannot scorn
Father Breath once more farewellBirth you gave was no thing illMy heart is still, as time will tell.
Allen Ginsberg

Father's Day Poem 13
The Mountain Tomb POUR wine and dance if manhood still have pride,Bring roses if the rose be yet in bloom;The cataract smokes upon the mountain side,Our Father Rosicross is in his tomb.Pull down the blinds, bring fiddle and clarionetThat there be no foot silent in the roomNor mouth from kissing, nor from wine unwet;Our Father Rosicross is in his tomb.In vain, in pain; the cataract still cries;The everlasting taper lights the gloom;All wisdom shut into his onyx eyes,Our Father Rosicross sleeps in his tomb.
William Butler Yeats

Father's Day Poem 14
The Land of Dreams Awake, awake, my little boy!Thou wast thy mother's only joy;Why dost thou weep in thy gentle sleep?Awake! thy father does thee keep.
"O, what land is the Land of Dreams?What are its mountains, and what are its streams?O father! I saw my mother there,Among the lilies by waters fair.
"Among the lambs, cloth?d in white,She walk'd with her Thomas in sweet delight.I wept for joy, like a dove I mourn;O! when shall I again return?"
Dear child, I also by pleasant streamsHave wander'd all night in the Land of Dreams;But tho' calm and warm the waters wide,I could not get to the other side.
"Father, O father! what do we hereIn this land of unbelief and fear?The Land of Dreams is better farAbove the light of the morning star."
William Blake
Father's Day Poem 15
Casabianca The boy stood on the burning deckWhence all but he had fled;The flame that lit the battle's wreckShone round him o'er the dead.Yet beautiful and bright he stood,As born to rule the storm;A creature of heroic blood,A proud, though childlike form.
The flames roll'd on...he would not goWithout his father's word;That father, faint in death below,His voice no longer heard.
He call'd aloud..."Say, father,sayIf yet my task is done!"He knew not that the chieftain layUnconscious of his son.
"Speak, father!" once again he cried"If I may yet be gone!"And but the booming shots replied,And fast the flames roll'd on.
Upon his brow he felt their breath,And in his waving hair,And looked from that lone post of death,In still yet brave despair;
And shouted but one more aloud,"My father, must I stay?"While o'er him fast, through sail and shroudThe wreathing fires made way,
They wrapt the ship in splendour wild,They caught the flag on high,And stream'd above the gallant child,Like banners in the sky.
There came a burst of thunder sound...The boy-oh! where was he?Ask of the winds that far aroundWith fragments strewed the sea.
With mast, and helm, and pennon fair,That well had borne their part;But the noblest thing which perished thereWas that young faithful heart.
Felicia Dorothea Hemans
Father's Day Poem 16
Father My father knows the proper wayThe nation should be run;He tells us children every dayJust what should now be done.He knows the way to fix the trusts,He has a simple plan;But if the furnace needs repairs,We have to hire a man.My father, in a day or twoCould land big thieves in jail;There's nothing that he cannot do,He knows no word like "fail.""Our confidence" he would restore,Of that there is no doubt;But if there is a chair to mend,We have to send it out.
All public questions that arise,He settles on the spot;He waits not till the tumult dies,But grabs it while it's hot.In matters of finance he canTell Congress what to do;But, O, he finds it hard to meetHis bills as they fall due.
It almost makes him sick to readThe things law-makers say;Why, father's just the man they need,He never goes astray.All wars he'd very quickly end,As fast as I can write it;But when a neighbor starts a fuss,'Tis mother has to fight it.
In conversation father canDo many wondrous things;He's built upon a wiser planThan presidents or kings.He knows the ins and outs of eachAnd every deep transaction;We look to him for theories,But look to ma for action.
Edgar Albert Guest
Father's Day Poem 17
Hymn 11 ~ The humble enlightened, and carnal reason humbled.
Luke 10:21,22.
There was an hour when Christ rejoiced,And spoke his joy in words of praise:"Father, I thank thee, mighty God,Lord of the earth, and heav'ns, and seas.
"I thank thy sovereign power and loveThat crowns my doctrine with success,And makes the babes in knowledge learnThe heights, and breadths, and lengths of grace.
"But all this glory lies concealedFrom men of prudence and of wit;The prince of darkness blinds their eyes,And their own pride resists the light.
"Father, 'tis thus, because thy willChose and ordained it should be so;'Tis thy delight t' abase the proud,And lay the haughty scorner low.
"There's none can know the Father rightBut those who learn it from the Son;Nor can the Son be well receivedBut where the Father makes him known."
Then let our souls adore our God,Who deals his graces as he please;Nor gives to mortals an accountOr of his actions or decrees.
Isaac Watts

Father's Day Poem 18
Come Back to the Farm!Brother, come back! come back!Dear brother, what can be the charm,That holds you so strong -- that keeps you so longAway from your father's able farm?Poor Father, he tells how he needs you --And would it be more than is due.His labors to share, his burdens to bear,Who once bore your burdens for you!
'Tis the voice of your sister -- she calls you,In tones both of love and alarm!"By dead mother's prayers -- by father's gray hairs --Dear brother, come back to the farm."
Father, tho' years agoThe ablest and strongest of men,Is failing at last -- you know he has pastThe milestone of three-score and ten.He's feeble, he's trembling, he's lonely,Who once was so fearless and brave;Yet you are away, while day after dayHe totters on down to the grave.
Come from the wide, wide world,Where dangers and perile abound!Oh how can you roam so far from your home,Where safety and comfort are found?Come bring us the light of your presence,Come give us the strength of your arm;That we may once more see joy, as of yore,Sit smiling upon the old farm.
Henry Clay Work
Father's Day Poem 19
Lilian StewartI was the daughter of Lambert Hutchins,Born in a cottage near the grist-mill,Reared in the mansion there on the hill,With its spires, bay-windows, and roof of slate.How proud my mother was of the mansion!How proud of father's rise in the world!And how my father loved and watched us,And guarded our happiness.But I believe the house was a curse,For father's fortune was little beside it;And when my husband found he had marriedA girl who was really poor,He taunted me with the spires,And called the house a fraud on the world,A treacherous lure to young men, raising hopesOf a dowry not to be had;And a man while selling his voteShould get enough from the people's betrayalTo wall the whole of his family in.He vexed my life till I went back homeAnd lived like an old maid till I died,Keeping house for father.
Edgar Lee Masters
Father's Day Poem 20
The Little Big ManI am small because I am a little child. I shall be big when I amas old as my father is.My teacher will come and say, "It is late, bring your slateand your books."I shall tell him, " Do you not know I am as big as father? AndI must not have lessons any more."My master will wonder and say, "He can leave his books if helikes, for he is grown up."I shall dress myself and walk to the fair where the crowd isthick.My uncle will come rushing up to me and say, "You will getlost, my boy; let me carry you."I shall answer, "Can't you see, uncle, I am as big as father?I must go to the fair alone."Uncle will say, "Yes, he can go wherever he likes, for he isgrown up."Mother will come from her bath when I am giving money to mynurse, for I shall know how to open the box with my key.Mother will say, "What are you about, naughty child?"I shall tell her, "Mother, don't you know, I am as big asfather, and I must give silver to my nurse."Mother will say to herself, "He can give money to whom helikes, for he is grown up."In the holiday time in October father will come home and,thinking that I am still a baby, will bring for me from the townlittle shoes and small silken frocks.I shall say, "Father, give them to my data, for I am as bigas you are."Father will think and say, "He can buy his own clothes if helikes, for he is grown up."
Rabindranath Tagore


Father's Day Poem 21
Illa-hi-Nama ~ Book of GodIn the Book of God ~ Ilahi-nama 'Attar framed his mystical teachings in various stories that a caliph tells his six sons, who are kings themselves and seek worldly pleasures and power.The first son is captivated by a virgin princess, and his father tells him the adventures of a beautiful and virtuous woman who attracts several men but miraculously survives their abuse and then forgives them. They acknowledge that carnal desire is necessary to propagate the race but also recognize that passionate love can lead to spiritual love, which can annihilate the soul in the beloved.Other stories indicate the importance of respecting the lives of other creatures such as ants or dogs. One only thinks oneself better than a dog because of one's dog-like nature. The second son tells his father that his heart craves magic; but his father warns him against the work of the Devil. A monk tells a shaikh that he has chosen the job of locking up a savage dog inside himself, and he advises the shaikh to lock up anger lest he be changed into a dog. The father suggests that this son ask for something more worthy and tells an anecdote in which Jesus teaches a man the greatest name of God. The man uses it to make bones come alive into a lion, which devours him, leaving his bones. Jesus then says that when a person asks for something unworthy, God does not grant it. Birds and beasts flee from people, because people eat them. God tells Moses to watch his heart when he is alone, to be kind and watch his tongue when he is with people, the road in front when he is walking, and his gullet when he is dining. A saint tells a shaikh that love is never denied to humans, for only the lover knows the true value of the beloved. Another saint warns that unless you pray for protection from negativity ~ the Devil, you shall not enter the court of God.
The third son of the caliph asks for a cup that could display the whole world. 'Attar concluded a story by saying that Sufism is to rest in patience and forsake all desire for the world, and trust in God means bridling one's tongue and wishing for better things for others than for oneself. This son asks why his father seems to disparage the love of honor and the love of wealth which all seem to possess. The caliph replies that in the crazy prison of the world one can achieve greatness only by devotion. Since one speaks to God through the heart and soul, it is difficult to speak with God of worldly things. The third son asks if he can be allowed to seek power in moderation; but the father still warns that this will place screens between him and God. Each screen created by seeking power will create more screens. One must see both the good and the bad inside and outside oneself to understand how they are connected together. Saints who reach their goal see nothingness in all things, making sugar seem like poison and a rose like thorns. Ayaz advises the conquering sultan Mahmud to leave his self behind since he is better being entirely We. In the last story for his third son, the father says that thousands of arts, mysteries, definitions, commands, prohibitions, orders, and injunctions are founded on the intellect. What cup could be more revealing than this?
The fourth son seeks the water of life, and his father warns him against desire. A wise man considers Alexander the Great the slave of his slave, because the Greek conqueror has submitted to greed and desire, which this wise man controls. If the son cannot have the water of life, he asks for the knowledge that will illuminate his heart. In one story 'Attar concluded that if you are not faithful in love, you are in love only with yourself. The fifth son asks for the ring of Solomon that enables one to communicate with birds and other animals. The Way is summarized as seeing the true road, traveling light, and doing no harm. The father tells this son that he has chosen an earthly kingdom, because he has not heard of the kingdom of the next world. He advises this king that since his sovereignty will not endure not to load the whole world on his shoulders. Why take on the burden of all creation? The caliph suggests that his son practice contentment, which is an eternal kingdom that overshadows even the Sun. When Joseph was thrown into a pit, the angel Gabriel counseled him that it is better to notice a single blemish in yourself than to see a hundred lights of the Unseen.
The sixth son desires to practice alchemy, but his father perceives that he is caught in the snare of greed. Gold is held more tightly by a miser than the rock grips the ore. The son observes that excessive poverty often leads to losing faith, and so he asks God for both the philosopher's stone and for gold; but his father replies that one cannot promote both faith and the world at the same time. In the epilog the poet commented that since he receives his daily bread from the Unseen, he does not have to be the slave of wretched men, and 'Attar concluded this work with the satisfaction that he has perfumed the name of God with his poetry.
Farid al-Din Attar
Father's Day Poem 22
The Blind RowerAnd since he rowed his father home,His hand has never touched an oar.All day he wanders on the shore,And hearkens to the swishing foam.Though blind from birth, he still could rowAs well as any lad with sight;And knew strange things that none may knowSave those who live without the light. When they put out that Summer eveTo sink the lobster-pots at sea,The sun was crimson in the sky;And not a breath was in the sky;The brooding, thunder-laden sky,That, heavily and wearily,Weighed down upon the waveless seaThat scarcely seamed to heave.
The pots were safely sunk; and thenThe father gave the word for home:He took the tiller in his hand,And, in hi s heart already home,He brought her nose round towards the land,To steer her straight for home.
He never spoke,Nor stirred again:A sudden stroke,And he lay dead,With staring eyes, and lips off lead.
The son rowed on, and nothing feared:And sometimes, merrily,He lifted up his voice, and sang,Both high and low,And loud and sweet:For he was ever gay at sea,And ever glad to row,And rowed as only blind men row:And little did the blind lad knowThat death was at his feet:For still he thought his father steered;Nor knew that he was all aloneWith death upon the open sea.So merrily, he rowed, and sang:And, strangely on the silence rangThat lonely melody,As, through the livid, brooding gloam,By rock and reef, he rowed for home--The blind man rowed the dead man home.
But, as they neared the shore,He rested on his oar:And, wondering that his father keptSo very quiet in the stern,He laughed, and asked him if he slept;And vowed he heard him snore just now.Though, when his father spoke no word,A sudden fear upon him came:And, crying on his father's name,With flinching heart, he heardThe water lapping on the shore;And all his blood ran cold, to feelThe shingle grate beneath the keel:And stretching over towards the stern,His knuckle touched the dead man's brow.
But help was near at hand;And safe he came to land:Though none has ever knownHow he rowed in, alone,And never touched a reef.Some say they saw the dead man steer--The dead man steer the blind man home--Though, when they found him dead,His hand was cold as lead.
So, ever restless, to and fro,In every sort of weather,The blind lad wanders on the shore,And hearkens to the foam.His hand has never touched an oar,Since they came home together--The blind, who rowed his father home--The dear, who steered his blind son home.
Wilfred Wilson Gibson

Father's Day Poem 23
MoonchildWhatever slid into my mother's room thatlate june night, tapping her great belly,summoned me out roundheaded and unsmiling.is this the moon, my father used to grin.cradling me? it was the moonbut nobody knew it then.
The moon understands dark places.the moon has secrets of her own.she holds what light she can.
We girls were ten years old and gigglingin our hand-me-downs. we wanted breasts,pretended that we had them, tissuedour undershirts. jay johnson is teachingme to french kiss, ella bragged, whois teaching you? how do you say; my father?
The moon is queen of everything.she rules the oceans, rivers, rain.when I am asked whose tears these areI always blame the moon.
Lucille Clifton
Father's Day Poem 24
Memory of My FatherEvery old man I seeReminds me of my fatherWhen he had fallen in love with deathOne time when sheaves were gathered.
That man I saw in Gardner StreetStumbled on the kerb was one,He stared at me half-eyed,I might have been his son.
And I remember the musicianFaltering over his fiddleIn Bayswater, London,He too set me the riddle.
Every old man I seeIn October-coloured weatherSeems to say to me:"I was once your father."
Patrick Kavanagh
Father's Day Poem 25
To a FriendWell, Lizzie Anderson! seventeen men--andthe baby hard to find a father for!
What will the good Father in Heaven sayto the local judge if he do not solve this problem?A little two-pointed smile and--pouff!--the law is changed into a mouthful of phrases.
William Carlos Williams
Father's Day Poem 26
Never AgainNever again will I weepAnd wring my handsAnd beat my head against the wallBecauseMe nolentem fata trahuntButWhen I have had enoughI will ariseAnd go unto my FatherAnd I will say to Him:Father, I have had enough.
Stevie Smith

Father's Day Poem 27
Earth's AnswerEarth raised up her headFrom the darkness dread and drear,Her light fled,Stony, dread,And her locks covered with grey despair.
'Prisoned on watery shore,Starry jealousy does keep my denCold and hoar;Weeping o're,I hear the father of the ancient men.
'Selfish father of men!Cruel, jealous, selfish fear!Can delight,Chained in night,The virgins of youth and morning bear?
'Does spring hide its joy,When buds and blossoms grow?Does the sowerSow by night,Or the plowman in darkness plough?
'Break this heavy chain,That does freeze my bones around!Selfish, vain,Eternal bane,That free love with bondage bound.'
William Blake
Father's Day Poem 28
A British-Roman Song~ A. D. 406"A Centurion of the Thirtieth"
My father's father saw it not,And I, belike, shall never comeTo look on that so-holy spot --That very Rome --
Crowned by all Time, all Art, all Might,The equal work of Gods and Man,City beneath whose oldest height --The Race began!
Soon to send forth again a brood,Unshakable, we pray, that clingsTo Rome's thrice-hammered hardihood --In arduous things.
Strong heart with triple armour bound,Beat strongly, for thy life-blood runs,Age after Age, the Empire round --In us thy Sons
Who, distant from the Seven Hills,Loving and serving much, requireThee -- thee to guard 'gainst home-born illsThe Imperial Fire!
Rudyard Kipling

Father's Day Poem 29
Infant SorrowMy mother groaned, my father wept,Into the dangerous world I leapt;Helpless, naked, piping loud,Like a fiend hid in a cloud.
Struggling in my father's hands,Striving against my swaddling bands,Bound and weary, I thought bestTo sulk upon my mother's breast.
William Blake
Father's Day Poem 30
Pine ForestLet us go now into the forest.Trees will pass by your face,and I will stop and offer you to them,but they cannot bend down.The night watches over its creatures,except for the pine trees that never change:the old wounded springs that springblessed gum, eternal afternoons.If they could, the trees would lift youand carry you from valley to valley,and you would pass from arm to arm,a child runningfrom father to father.
Gabriela Mistral
Father's Day Poem 31
AlgernonWho played with a Loaded Gun, and, on missing his Sister was reprimanded by his Father.
Young Algernon, the Doctor's Son,Was playing with a Loaded Gun.He pointed it towards his Sister,Aimed very carefully, butMissed her!His Father, who was standing near,The Loud Explosion chanced to Hear,And reprimanded AlgernonFor playing with a Loaded Gun.
Hilaire Belloc

Father's Day Poem 32
FreedomWhat freeman knoweth freedom? Never heWhose father's father through long lives have reignedO'er kingdoms which mere heritage attained.Though from his youth to age he roam as freeAs winds, he dreams not freedom's ecstacy.But he whose birth was in a nation chainedFor centuries; where every breath was drainedFrom breasts of slaves which knew not there could beSuch thing as freedom,--he beholds the lightBurst, dazzling; though the glory blind his sightHe knows the joy. Fools laugh because he reelsAnd weilds confusedly his infant will;The wise man watching with a heart that feelsSays: "Cure for freedom's harms is freedom still."
Helen Hunt Jackson
Father's Day Poem 33
The Gold LilyAs I perceiveI am dying now and knowI will not speak again, will notsurvive the earth, be summonedout of it again, nota flower yet, a spine only, raw dirtcatching my ribs, I call you,father and master: all around,my companions are failing, thinkingyou do not see. Howcan they know you seeunless you save us?In the summer twilight, are youclose enough to hearyour child's terror? Orare you not my father,you who raised me?
Louise Gluck

Father's Day Poem 34
Alice SickSick, Alice grown, and fearing dire event,Some friend advised a servant should be sentHer confessor to bring and ease her mind;--Yes, she replied, to see him I'm inclined;Let father Andrew instantly be sought:--By him salvation usually I'm taught.
A messenger was told, without delay,To take, with rapid steps, the convent way;He rang the bell--a monk enquired his name,And asked for what, or whom, the fellow came.I father Andrew want, the wight replied,Who's oft to Alice confessor and guide:With Andrew, cried the other, would you speak?If that's the case, he's far enough to seek;Poor man! he's left us for the regions blessed,And has in Paradise ten years confessed.
Jean de La Fontaine
Father's Day Poem 35
SavantismThither, as I look, I see each result and glory retracing itself andnestling close, always obligated;Thither hours, months, years--thither trades, compacts,establishments, even the most minute;Thither every-day life, speech, utensils, politics, persons, estates;Thither we also, I with my leaves and songs, trustful, admirant,As a father, to his father going, takes his children along with him.
Walt Whitman
Father's Day Poem 36
The Love Song ofHar DyalAlone upon the housetops to the NorthI turn and watch the lightnings in the sky--The glamour of thy footsteps in the North.Come back to me, Beloved, or I die.
Below my feet the still bazar is laid--Far, far below the weary camels lie--The camels and the captives of thy raid.Come back to me, Beloved, or I die!
My father's wife is old and harsh with years,And drudge of all my father's house am I--My bread is sorrow and my drink is tears.Come back to me, Beloved, or I die!
Rudyard Kipling
Father's Day Poem 37
ToursA girl on the stairs listens to her fatherBeat up her mother.Doors bang.She comes down in her nightgown.
The piano stands there in the darkLike a boy with an orchid.
She plays what she canThen she turns the lamp on.
Her mother's music is spread outOn the floor like brochures.
She hears her fatherRunning through the leaves.
The last black keyShe presses stays down, makes no soundSomeone putting their tongue where their tooth had been.
C. D. Wright

Father's Day Poem 38
He told a homely taleHe told a homely taleAnd spotted it with tears—Upon his infant face was setThe Cicatrice of years—
All crumpled was the cheekNo other kiss had knownThan flake of snow, divided withThe Redbreast of the Barn—
If Mother—in the Grave—Or Father—on the Sea—Or Father in the Firmament—Or Brethren, had he—
If Commonwealth below,Or Commonwealth aboveHave missed a Barefoot Citizen—I've ransomed it—alive—
Emily Dickinson
Father's Day Poem 39
Percy Bysshe Shelley My father who owned the wagon-shopAnd grew rich shoeing horsesSent me to the University of Montreal.I learned nothing and returned home,Roaming the fields with Bert Kessler,Hunting quail and snipe.At Thompson's Lake the trigger of my gunCaught in the side of the boatAnd a great hole was shot through my heart.Over me a fond father erected this marble shaft,On which stands the figure of a womanCarved by an Italian artist.They say the ashes of my namesakeWere scattered near the pyramid of Caius CestiusSomewhere near Rome.
Edgar Lee Masters

Father's Day Poem 40
The Bread-Knife Ballad A little child was sitting Up on her mother's kneeAnd down down her cheeks the bitter tears did flow.And as I sadly listened I heard this tender plea,'Twas uttered in a voice so soft and low.
"Not guilty" said the Jury And the Judge said "Set her free,But remember it must not occur again.And next time you must listen to you little daughter's plea,"Then all the Court did join in this refrain.
Chorus:"Please Mother don't stab Father with the BREAD-KNIFE,Remember 'twas a gift when you were wed.But if you must stab Father with the BREAD-KNIFE,Please Mother use another for the BREAD."
Robert W. Service


Father's Day Poem 41
The Farmer's Daughter The Rector met a little lassWho led a heifer by a rope.Said he: "Why don't you go to Mass?Do you not want to please the Pope?"
The village maiden made reply,As on the rope she ceased to pull:"My father said this morning IMust take Paquerette to see the bull."
The Rector frowned. ";Tis wrong, I wistTo leave your prayer-book on the shelf.Your father has a stronger wrist;Why can't he do the job himself?"
Then lovely in her innocence,With gaze as pure as meadow pool,The maid spoke in her sire's defense:"But Daddy, please your Reverence,Would rather leave it to the bull."
Robert W. Service
Father's Day Poem 42
Dream Song 82:Op. posth. no. 5 Maskt as honours, insult like behavingmissiles homes. I bow, & grunt 'Thank you.I'm glad you could comeso late.' All loves are gratified. I'm havingto screw a little thing I have to screw.Good nature is over.
Herewith ill-wishes. From a cozy graverainbow I scornful laughings. Do not do,Father, me down.Let's shuck an obligation. O I havedone. Is the inner-coffin burning blueor did Jehovah frown?
Jehovah. Period. Yahweh. Period. God.It is marvellous that views so differay~ Father is a Jesuitcan love so well each other. We was had.O visit in my last tomb me.—Perché?—Is a nice pit.
John Berryman
Father's Day Poem 43
To R.W.E. As when a father dies, his children drawAbout the empty hearth, their loss to cheatWith uttered praise & love, & oft repeatHis all-familiar words with whispered awe.The honored habit of his daily law,Not for his sake, but theirs whose feeble feetNeed still that guiding lamp, whose faith, less sweet,Misses that tempered patience without flaw,So do we gather round thy vacant chair,In thine own elm-roofed, amber-rivered town,Master & Father! For the love we bear,Not for thy fame's sake, do we weave this crown,And feel thy presence in the sacred air,Forbidding us to weep that thou art gone.
Emma Lazarus

Father's Day Poem 44
Miranda's Song Ye elves! when spangled starlight gleams,That flit beneath the ray,Till morning darts her magic beamsAnd pale night hies away:Ye know where springs each flow'ret rare,The sweetest seek for me:I'll weave a chaplet rich and fair—My father! 'tis for thee!
The flow'rs, the trees, the birds appearTo wait but on my call;But he whose power has plac'd them hereIs dearer far than all:My thoughts with tender pleasure restOn each delight I see;But all the love that swells in my breast,My father, is for thee!
Louisa Stuart Costello
Father's Day Poem 45
Talking to My Father,Whose Ashes Sit in a Closet and Listen Death is not the final word.Without ears, my father still listens,still shrugs his shoulderswhenever I ask a question he doesn't want to answer.
I stand at the closet door, my hand on the knob,my hip leaning against the frame and ask himwhat does he think about the war in Iraqand how does he feel about his oldest daughtergetting married to a man she met on the Internet.
Without eyes, my father still looks around.He sees what I am trying to do, sees that Ihave grown less passive with his passing,understands my need for answers only he can provide.
I imagine him drawing a breath, sensinghis lungs once again filling with air, his thoughts ballooning.
Lisa Zaran
Father's Day Poem 46
Hymn 131 ~ The Pharisee and publican.
Luke 18:10ff.
Saints, at your heav'nly Father's wordGive up your comforts to the Lord;Behold how sinners disagree,The publican and Pharisee!One doth his righteousness proclaim,The other owns his guilt and shame.
This man at humble distance stands,And cries for grace with lifted handsThat boldly rises near the throne,And talks of duties he has done.
The Lord their diff'rent language knows,And diff'rent answers he bestows;The humble soul with grace he crowns,Whilst on the proud his anger frowns.
Dear Father! let me never beJoined with the boasting Pharisee;I have no merits of my ownBut plead the suff'rings of thy Son.
Isaac Watts
Father's Day Poem 47
Paulo Post Futuri Weep ye not, ye children dear,
That as yet ye are unborn:For each sorrow and each tear
Makes the father's heart to mourn.
Patient be a short time to it,
Unproduced, and known to none;If your father cannot do it,
By your mother 'twill be done.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Father's Day Poem 48
The Gold Lily As I perceiveI am dying now and knowI will not speak again, will notsurvive the earth, be summonedout of it again, nota flower yet, a spine only, raw dirtcatching my ribs, I call you,father and master: all around,my companions are failing, thinkingyou do not see. Howcan they know you seeunless you save us?In the summer twilight, are youclose enough to hearyour child's terror? Orare you not my father,you who raised me?
Louise Glück
Father's Day Poem 49
Dialogue BetweenGhost and Priest In the rectory garden on his evening walkPaced brisk Father Shawn. A cold day, a sodden one it wasIn black November. After a sliding rainDew stood in chill sweat on each stalk,Each thorn; spiring from wet earth, a blue hazeHung caught in dark-webbed branches like a fabulous heron.
Hauled sudden from solitude,Hair prickling on his head,Father Shawn perceived a ghostShaping itself from that mist.
'How now,' Father Shawn crisply addressed the ghostWavering there, gauze-edged, smelling of woodsmoke,'What manner of business are you on?From your blue pallor, I'd say you inhabited the frozen wasteOf hell, and not the fiery part. Yet to judge by that dazzled look,That noble mien, perhaps you've late quitted heaven?'
In voice furred with frost,Ghost said to priest:'Neither of those countries do I frequent:Earth is my haunt.'
'Come, come,' Father Shawn gave an impatient shrug,'I don't ask you to spin some ridiculous fableOf gilded harps or gnawing fire: simply tellAfter your life's end, what just epilogueGod ordained to follow up your days. Is it such troubleTo satisfy the questions of a curious old fool?'
'In life, love gnawed my skinTo this white bone;What love did then, love does now:Gnaws me through.'
'What love,' asked Father Shawn, 'but too great loveOf flawed earth-flesh could cause this sorry pass?Some damned condition you are in:Thinking never to have left the world, you grieveAs though alive, shriveling in torment thusTo atone as shade for sin that lured blind man.'
'The day of doomIs not yest come.Until that timeA crock of dust is my dear hom.'
'Fond phantom,' cried shocked Father Shawn,'Can there be such stubbornness--A soul grown feverish, clutching its dead body-treeLike a last storm-crossed leaf? Best get you goneTo judgment in a higher court of grace.Repent, depart, before God's trump-crack splits the sky.'
From that pale mistGhost swore to priest:'There sits no higher courtThan man's red heart.'
Sylvia Plath
Father's Day Poem 50
Veni, Creator Spiritus Creator Spirit, by whose aidThe world's foundations first were laid,Come, visit ev'ry pious mind;Come, pour thy joys on human kind;From sin, and sorrow set us free;And make thy temples worthy Thee.
O, Source of uncreated Light,The Father's promis'd Paraclete!Thrice Holy Fount, thrice Holy Fire,Our hearts with heav'nly love inspire;Come, and thy Sacred Unction bringTo sanctify us, while we sing!
Plenteous of grace, descend from high,Rich in thy sev'n-fold energy!Thou strength of his Almighty Hand,Whose pow'r does heav'n and earth command:Proceeding Spirit, our Defence,Who do'st the gift of tongues dispence,And crown'st thy gift with eloquence!
Refine and purge our earthly parts;But, oh, inflame and fire our hearts!Our frailties help, our vice control;Submit the senses to the soul;And when rebellious they are grown,Then, lay thy hand, and hold 'em down.
Chase from our minds th' Infernal Foe;And peace, the fruit of love, bestow;And, lest our feet should step astray,Protect, and guide us in the way.
Make us Eternal Truths receive,And practise, all that we believe:Give us thy self, that we may seeThe Father and the Son, by thee.
Immortal honour, endless fame,Attend th' Almighty Father's name:The Saviour Son be glorified,Who for lost Man's redemption died:And equal adoration be,Eternal Paraclete, to thee.
John Dryden
Father's Day Poem 51
Superior Mother, your baby is silly! She is so absurdly childish!She does not know the difference between the lights in thestreets and the stars.When we play at eating with pebbles, she thinks they are realfood, and tries to put them into her mouth.When I open a book before her and ask her to learn her a, b,c, she tears the leaves with her hands and roars for joy atnothing; this is your baby's way of doing her lesson.When I shake my head at her in anger and scold her and callher naughty, she laughs and thinks it great fun.Everybody knows that father is away, but if in play I callaloud "Father," she looks about her in excitement and thinks thatfather is near.When I hold my class with the donkeys that our washer manbrings to carry away the clothes and I warn her that I am theschoolmaster, she will scream for no reason and call me dada.Your baby wants to catch the moon. She is so funny; she callsGanesh Ganush.Mother, your baby is silly! She is so absurdly childish!
Rabindranath Tagore
Father's Day Poem 52
Blood "A true Arab knows how to catch a fly in his hands,"my father would say. And he'd prove it,cupping the buzzer instantlywhile the host with the swatter stared.
In the spring our palms peeled like snakes.True Arabs believed watermelon could heal fifty ways.I changed these to fit the occasion.
Years before, a girl knocked,wanted to see the Arab.I said we didn't have one.After that, my father told me who he was,"Shihab"--"shooting star"--a good name, borrowed from the sky.Once I said, "When we die, we give it back?"He said that's what a true Arab would say.
Today the headlines clot in my blood.A little Palestinian dangles a truck on the front page.Homeless fig, this tragedy with a terrible rootis too big for us. What flag can we wave?I wave the flag of stone and seed,table mat stitched in blue.
I call my father, we talk around the news.It is too much for him,neither of his two languages can reach it.I drive into the country to find sheep, cows,to plead with the air:Who calls anyone civilized?Where can the crying heart graze?What does a true Arab do now?
Naomi Shihab Nye


Father's Day Poem 53
The Orphan My father and mother are dead,Nor friend, nor relation I know;And now the cold earth is their bed,And daisies will over them grow.
I cast my eyes into the tomb,The sight made me bitterly cry;I said, "And is this the dark room,Where my father and mother must lie?"
I cast my eyes round me again,In hopes some protector to see;Alas! but the search was in vain,For none had compassion on me.
I cast my eyes up to the sky,I groan'd, though I said not a word;Yet GOD was not deaf to my cry,The Friend of the fatherless heard.
For since I have trusted his care,And learn'd on his word to depend,He has kept me from every snare,And been my best Father and Friend.
Jane Taylor
Father's Day Poem 54
When Heaving onthe Stormy Waters When, heaving on the stormy waters,I felt my ship beneath to sink,I prayed, "Oh, Father Satan, save me,Forgive me at death's utter brink!
"If you will save my soul embitteredFrom perishing before its hour,The days to come, the nights that followI vow to vice, I pledge to power."
The Devil forthwith snatched and flung meInto a boat; the sides were frail,But on the bench the oars were lyingAnd in the bow an old gray sail.
And landward once again I carriedMy outcast soul, bereft of kin,Upon its sick and vicious sojournMy body and its gift of sin.
And I am faithful, Father Satan,Unto my evil hour's vow,When from my drowning ship you saved meAnd when I prayed you guide the prow.
To you descend my praises, Father,No day from bitter blame exempt.O'er worlds my blasphemy shall tower;And I shall tempt -- and I shall tempt.
Fyodor Sologub

Father's Day Poem 55
The Destruction Of MagdeburgOh, Magdeberg the town!Fair maids thy beauty crown,Thy charms fair maids and matrons crown;Oh, Magdeburg the town!
Where all so blooming stands,Advance fierce Tilly's bands;O'er gardens and o'er well--till'd landsAdvance fierce Tilly's bands.
Now Tilly's at the gate.Our homes who'll liberate?Go, loved one, hasten to the gate,And dare the combat straight!
There is no need as yet,However fierce his threat;Thy rosy cheeks I'll kiss, sweet pet!There is no need as yet.
My longing makes me pale.Oh, what can wealth avail?E'en now thy father may be pale.Thou mak'st my courage fail.
Oh, mother, give me bread!Is then my father dead?Oh, mother, one small crust of bread!Oh, what misfortune dread!
Thy father, dead lies he,The trembling townsmen flee,Adown the street the blood runs free;Oh, whither shall we flee?
The churches ruined lie,The houses burn on high,The roofs they smoke, the flames out fly,Into the street then hie!
No safety there they meet!The soldiers fill the Street,With fire and sword the wreck complete:No safety there they meet!
Down falls the houses' line,Where now is thine or mine?That bundle yonder is not thine,Thou flying maiden mine!
The women sorrow sore.The maidens far, far more.The living are no virgins more;Thus Tilly's troops make war!
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Father's Day Poem 56
Hymn 143 ~ Characters of the children of God. From several scriptures.So new-born babes desire the breast,To feed, and grow, and thrive;So saints with joy the gospel taste,And by the gospel live.
[With inward gust their heart approvesAll that the word relates;They love the men their Father loves,And hate the works he hates.]
[Not all the flatt'ring baits on earthCan make them slaves to lust;They can't forget their heav'nly birth,Nor grovel in the dust.
Not all the chains that tyrants useShall bind their souls to vice;Faith, like a conqueror, can produceA thousand victories.]
[Grace, like an uncorrupting seed,Abides and reigns within;Immortal principles forbidThe sons of God to sin.]
[Not by the terrors of a slaveDo they perform his will,But with the noblest powers they haveHis sweet commands fulfil.]
They find access at every hourTo God within the veil;Hence they derive a quick'ning power,And joys that never fail.
O happy souls! O glorious stateOf overflowing grace!To dwell so near their Father's seat,And see his lovely face!
Lord, I address thy heav'nly throne;Call me a child of thine;Send down the Spirit of thy SonTo form my heart divine.
There shed thy choicest loves abroad,And make my comforts strong:Then shall I say, "My Father God!"With an unwav'ring tongue.
Isaac Watts
Father's Day Poem 57
Hymn 64Adoption.1 John 3:1ff; Gal. 4:6.
Behold what wondrous graceThe Father has bestowedOn sinners of a mortal race,To call them sons of God!
'Tis no surprising thingThat we should be unknown;The Jewish world knew not their king,God's everlasting Son.
Nor doth it yet appearHow great we must be made;But when we see our Savior here,We shall be like our Head.
A hope so much divineMay trials well endure;May purge our souls from sense and sin,As Christ the Lord is pure.
If in my Father's loveI share a filial part,Send down thy Spirit like a dove,To rest upon my heart.
We would no longer lieLike slaves beneath the throne;My faith shall Abba, Father, cry,And thou the kindred own.
Isaac Watts
Father's Day Poem 58
Price Lake: 1961 Mouths shackled, dead or dying,the bluegills, rainbows and brownsdangled from shiny metalmy father had thrown like chaininto the shallows, noon sunshivering the lake's surfacelike mirage as snake doctorszigged and zagged—deep-blue needlesthreading air. My bobber snaggedagain in reeds, hot and tired,I entered a grabble of briars,tightroped a creek-board to wheremy parents lay on a bankblanketed by cove-moss, eachturned to other, my mother'shand tucked inside my father'shalf-unbuttoned shirt, his handbrushing ground-lint from her hair,and in that moment I knewI did not belong to them,not in that moment, and thoughthe gift of that summer tookyears to unveil, something stirredeven that day when they cameback to me, my mother's waistcradled by my father's arm,his free hand reaching to liftthe stringer. I rememberhow it surfaced glisteninglike a crystal chandelier,the fish shimmering coloras if raised in prism-light.
Ron Rash

Father's Day Poem 59
The Ballad ofFather O'Hart Good Father John O'HartIn penal days rode outTo a Shoneen who had free landsAnd his own snipe and trout.In trust took he John's lands;Sleiveens were all his race;And he gave them as dowers to his daughters.And they married beyond their place.But Father John went up,And Father John went down;And he wore small holes in his Shoes,And he wore large holes in his gown.All loved him, only the shoneen,Whom the devils have by the hair,From the wives, and the cats, and the children,To the birds in the white of the air.The birds, for he opened their cagesAs he went up and down;And he said with a smile, 'Have peace now';And he went his way with a frown.But if when anyone diedCame keeners hoarser than rooks,He bade them give over their keening;For he was a man of books.And these were the works of John,When, weeping score by score,People came into Colooney;For he'd died at ninety-four.There was no human keening;The birds from KnocknareaAnd the world round KnocknasheeCame keening in that day.The young birds and old birdsCame flying, heavy and sad;Keening in from Tiraragh,Keening from Ballinafad;Keening from Inishmurray.Nor stayed for bite or sup;This way were all reprovedWho dig old customs up.
William Butler Yeats
Father's Day Poem 60
The Drunkard's Child He stood beside his dying child,With a dim and bloodshot eye;They'd won him from the haunts of viceTo see his first-born die.He came with a slow and staggering tread,A vague, unmeaning stare,And, reeling, clasped the clammy hand,So deathly pale and fair.
In a dark and gloomy chamber,Life ebbing fast away,On a coarse and wretched pallet,The dying sufferer lay:A smile of recognitionLit up the glazing eye;"I'm very glad," it seemed to say,"You've come to see me die."
That smile reached to his callous heart,It sealed fountains stirred;He tried to speak, but on his lipsFaltered and died each word.And burning tears like rainPoured down his bloated face,Where guilt, remorse and shameHad scathed, and left their trace.
"My father!" said the dying child,~ His voice was faint and low,"Oh! clasp me closely to your heart,And kiss me ere I go.Bright angels beckon me away,To the holy city fair --Oh! tell me, Father, ere I go,Say, will you meet me there?"
He clasped him to his throbbing heart,"I will! I will!" he said;His pleading ceased -- the father heldHis first-born and his dead!The marble brow, with golden curls,Lay lifeless on his breast;Like sunbeams on the distant cloudsWhich line the gorgeous west.
Frances Ellen Watkins
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When God Created Fathers
When the good Lord was creating fathers, He started with a tall frame. And a female angel nearby said, "What kind of father is that? If you’re going to make children so close to the ground, why have you put fathers up so high? He won’t be able to shoot marbles without kneeling, tuck a child in bed without bending, or even kiss a child without a lot of stooping."
And God smiled and said, "Yes, but if I make him child size, who would children have to look up to?"
And when God made a father’s hands, they were large and sinewy.
And the angel shook her head sadly and said, "Do You know what You’re doing? Large hands are clumsy. They can’t manage diaper pins, small buttons, rubber bands on pony tails or even remove splinters caused by baseball bats."
God smiled and said, "I know, but they’re large enough to hold everything a small boy empties from his pockets at the end of a day…yet small enough to cup a child’s face."
Then God molded long, slim legs and broad shoulders.
The angel nearly had a heart attack. "Boy, this is the end of the week, all right," she clucked. "Do You realize You just made a father without a lap? How is he going to pull a child close to him without the kid falling between his legs?"
God smiled and said, "A mother needs a lap. A father needs strong shoulders to pull a sled, balance a boy on a bicycle or hold a sleepy head on the way home from the circus."
God was in the middle of creating two of the largest feet anyone had ever seen when the angel could contain herself no longer. "That’s not fair. Do You honestly think those large boats are going to dig out of bed early in the morning when the baby cries? Or walk through a small birthday party without crushing at least three of the guests?"
And God smiled and said, "They’ll work. You’ll see. They’ll support a small child who wants to "ride a horse to Banbury Cross" or scare off mice at the summer cabin, or display shoes that will be a challenge to fill."
God worked throughout the night, giving the father few words, but a firm authoritative voice; eyes that see everything, but remain calm and tolerant.
Finally, almost as an afterthought, He added tears. Then He turned to the angel and said, "Now are you satisfied that he can love as much as a mother?"
And the angel shutteth up!
~ Erma Bombeck.

Dad's Favorite Sayings!
* Go ask your mother!* Just wait until I get you home!* I love you, son!* I love you, princess!* When I was your age....* My father used to tell me...* I used to walk to school in the snow!* Be home early.* That's not a tear, I have something in my eye.

Father's Day Quotations
"Honour thy father and thy mother" stands written among the three laws of most revered righteousness.~ Aeschylus (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.~ Clarence Budington Kelland (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~ Harmon Killebrew (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters.~ George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640 (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~ Bill Cosby (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Father! - to God himself we cannot give a holier name. ~ William Wordsworth (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament. But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it. ~ Clarence Budington Kelland (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~ Enid Bagnold (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~ Johann Schiller (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~ Author Unknown (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~ Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836 (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~ Mark Twain, "Old Times on the Mississippi" Atlantic Monthly, 1874 (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~ Gloria Naylor (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~ John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994 (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~ Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~ Phyllis Diller (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~ Marceline Desbordes-Valmore (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~ Elizabeth Stone (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~ Red Buttons (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~ Colonel Potter (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
There's one sad truth in life I've foundWhile journeying east and west -The only folks we really woundAre those we love the best.We flatter those we scarcely know,We please the fleeting guest,And deal full many a thoughtless blowTo those who love us best. ~ Ella Wheeler Wilcox (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~ Dinah Craik (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~ Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.~ Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968 (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right,he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong." ~ Charles Wadsworth (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"A wise son makes a glad father, But a foolish son is the grief of his mother." ~ Solomon - Proverbs 10:1 NKJV (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"One night a father overheard his son pray: Dear God, Make me the kind of man my Daddy is. Later that night, the Father prayed, Dear God, Make me the kind of man my son wants me to be." ~ Unknown (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"A righteous man hates lying, But a wicked man is loathsome and comes to shame." ~ Solomon - Proverbs 13:5 NKJV (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"The righteous man walks in his integrity; His children are blessed after him." ~ Solomon - Proverbs 20:7 NKJV (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"Honor your father and your mother,that your days may be long upon the land which the LORD your God is giving you." ~ Exodus 20:12 (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)


"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years." ~ Mark Twain (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"If you want your children to improve, let them overhear the nice things you say about them to others. " ~ Haim Ginott (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"Don't handicap your children by making their lives easy." ~ Robert A. Heinlein (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"It is unreasonable [for a father] to expect moral success with [his] children without submittingto the laws of morality." ~ Larry Christenson (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"Becoming a man means integrity...staying true to God's Word...being responsible to others, regardless of their social position in life...loving the unlovable...humbling oneself." ~ Bob Welch (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"There is no friendship, no love, like that of the parent for the child." ~ Beecher (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"An effective father devotes himself to become an instrument and model of human experience to his children...accepts and affirms his children for who they are, appreciates them for what they are accomplishing, and covers them with affection because they are his." ~ Gordon MacDonald (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"The most effective guard against delinquency is a father who is at the same time bothstrict and loving." ~ Sheldon Glueck (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"You don't need to be right all the time. Your child wants a man for a fathernot a formula. He wants real parents, real people capableof making mistakes without moping about it." ~ C. D. Williams (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"To be in your children's memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today." ~ Barbara Johnson (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"Manhood has less to do with age than with enlightenment...With commitment...With repentance...It's found in the hearts of men, in a form of such attributes as courage, humility, and vulnerability." ~ Bob Welch (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)"Listen to your father who begot you, And do not despise your mother when she is old." ~ Solomon - Proverbs 23:22 NKJV (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"Whoever loves wisdom makes his father rejoice, But a companion of harlots wastes his wealth." ~ Proverbs 29:3 NKJV (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it." ~ Clarence Budington Kelland (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty." ~ Unknown (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"Another thing I liked about my Dad at church: he did his sleeping at home.He never used the church as an adult nursery." ~ Vance Havner (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"When you teach your son, you teach your son's son." ~ The Talmud (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"The Hebrew word for parents is horim, and it comes from the same rootas moreh, teacher. The parent is, and remains, the first and mostimportant teacher that the child will ever have." ~ Rabbi Kassel Abelson (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn.If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight.If a child lives with fear, he learns to be apprehensive.If a child lives with jealousy, he learns to feel guilty.If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient.If a child lives with encouragement, he learns to be confident.If a child lives with praise, he learns to be appreciative.If a child lives with acceptance, he learns to love.If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself.If a child lives with recognition, he learns it is good to have a goal.If a child lives with honesty, he learns what truth is.If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice.If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith in himself and those about him.If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself.If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he learns to find love in the world." ~ Dorothy Nolte (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
"Children seldom misquote you. They more often repeat word for wordwhat you shouldn't have said." ~ Mae Maloo (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
On President Theodore Roosevelt; in "Celebrity Register," by Cleveland Amory and Earl Blackwell, 1963. My father always wanted to be the corpse at every funeral, the bride at every wedding and the baby at every christening. ~ Alice RooseveltLongworth (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
The brotherhood of man is an integral part of Christianity no less than the Fatherhood of God; and to deny the one is no less infidel than to deny the other. ~ LymanAbbott (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
O what their joy and their glory must be, Those endless sabbaths the blessed ones see! crowns for the valiant, for weary ones rest: God shall be all, and in all ever blest. Truly Jerusalem name we that shore, vision of peace that brings hope evermore; wish and fulfillment shall severed be ne'er, nor the thing prayed for come short of the prayer. There, where no trouble distraction can bring, we the sweet anthems of Zion shall sing, while for thy grace, Lord, their voices of praise thy blessed people eternally raise. Now, in the meantime, with hearts raised on high, we for that country must yearn and must sigh, seeking Jerusalem, dear native land, through the long exile on Babylon's strand. Low before him with our praises we fall, of whom, and in whom, and through whom are all; of whom, the Father; and in whom, the Son; through whom, the Spirit, with both ever one. ~ Peter PierreAbélard (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
When on life’s journey it becomes our lot to travel with criticism of skeptics, the hate of some, the rejection of others, the impatience of many, or a friend’s betrayal, we must be able to pray in such a manner that an abiding faith and a strong testimony that the Lord will be with us to the end, will compel us to say, “Nevertheless, Father, Thy will be done, and with Thy help, in patience I will follow firmly on the path that takes me back to Thee.” ~ AngelAbrea (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
My grandfather always said that living is like licking honey off a thorn. ~ LouisAdamic (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Think of your forefathers! Think of your posterity! ~ John QuincyAdams (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Does faith begin to fail . . . ? Say not the Father hath not heard your prayer; You shall have your desire, sometime, somewhere. ~ Ophelia G.Adams (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)
Father asked us what was God's noblest work. Anna said men, but I said babies. Men are often bad, but babies never are. ~ Louisa MayAlcott (Father's Day Quotes, Father's Day Quotations)

Father's Day jokes,

Father's Day HumorFather's Day One-Liners
* My Dad thinks he wears the trousers in our house, but it's always Mum who tells him which pair to put on!* I started early teaching my kids the value of a dollar. From then on, they demanded their allowances in gold.* Do fathers always snore? No - only when they are asleep!* One time my kids wanted to surprise me with a good breakfast in bed on Father's Day. They put a cot in the kitchen.* If you think about it, Adam had more trouble than any of the rest of us buying his Father a gift for Father's Day. I mean, what do you get somebody who's Everything?* After the church service a little boy told the pastor, "When I grow up, I'm going to give you some money." "Well, thank you," the pastor replied, "but why?" "Because my daddy says you're one of the poorest preachers we've ever had."
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It was addressed, "Dad". With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:
Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with mom and you. I've been finding real passion with Joan and she is so nice even with all her piercing, tattoos and her tight motorcycle clothes. But it's not only the passion dad, she's pregnant and Joan said that we will be very happy. Even though you don't care for her as she is so much older than I, she already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.
She wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my dreams too. Joan taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and trading
it with her friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want! In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Joan can get better; she sure deserves it!!
Don't worry Dad. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.
Your son,
Benjamin
P. S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbor's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that's in my desk center drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.
One evening, while sitting around the dinner table, a little girl looked up and asked her father, "Daddy, you're the boss, right?" Her father was very pleased by this and replied, "Yes." Then, the little girl continued, "That's because mommy put you in charge, right?"
Top Ten Things You Will Never Hear A Dad Say :
- Well, what do you know? I'm lost. We'll have to stop and get some directions.- Well, honey, you are thirteen now. I bet you're ready for un-chaperoned car dates!- I like all of your friends' "Up Yours" attitudes.- Here are the keys to my new car. Oh, take my credit card, too. Have fun!- Football? You want to play football? What about figure skating, son?- Mom and I are going away for the weekend. Would you like to throw a party?- No, I don't actually know what is wrong with your car.- Son, let's go to the mall and get you an earring.- You don't need a job! I have plenty of money for you to spend.- Father's Day? Don't worry about that. It's no big deal!
Junior had just received his brand new driver's license. To celebrate the special day, the whole family went out to the driveway and climbed into the car for his first official drive. Dad went immediately to the back seat, right behind the newly licensed driver."I'll bet you are back there to get a change of scenery, right? After all these months of sitting up here, teaching me how to drive?" Junior said to his dad."Nope!" said dad. "I'm going to sit back here and kick the back of your seat as you drive, just like you've been doing to me for sixteen years!"
Why do golfers take an extra pair of socks?In case they get a hole in one!
What do you call two people who embarrass you in front of your friends?Mum and Dad!
My Dad thinks he wears the trousers in our house, but it's always Mum who tells him which pair to put on!
Knock knockWho's there?CanoeCanoe who?Canoe help me with my homework please Dad - I'm stuck!

Funny Quotes
To be a successful father, there's one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don't look at it for the first two years.~ Ernest Hemingway.The thing to remember about fathers is... they're men. A girl has to keep it in mind: They are dragon-seekers, bent on improbable rescues. Scratch any father, you find someone chock-full of qualms and romantic terrors, believing change is a threat, like your first shoes with heels on, like your first bicycle...~ Phyllis McGinley
If the relationship of father to son could really be reduced to biology, the whole earth would blaze with the glory of fathers and sons.~ James Baldwin
My father hated radio and he could not wait for television to be invented so that he could hate that too.~ Peter De Vries
Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards.~ Robert OrbenNever raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.~ Red Buttons
Jokes Again...
Today nearly 100 years have elapsed since the first father's Day was celebrated. Fathers of 1900 didn't have it nearly as good as fathers of today; but they did have a few advantages: In 1900, fathers prayed their children would learn English.Today, fathers pray their children will speak English.
In 1900, a father's horsepower meant his horses.Today, it's the size of his minivan.
In 1900, if a father put a roof over his family's head, he was a success. Today, it takes a roof, deck, pool, and 4-car garage. And that's just the vacation home.
In 1900, a father waited for the doctor to tell him when the baby arrived. Today, a father must wear a smock, know how to breathe, and make sure film is in the video camera.
In 1900, fathers passed on clothing to their sons. Today, kids wouldn't touch Dad's clothes if they were sliding naked down an icicle.
In 1900, fathers could count on children to join the family business. Today, fathers pray their kids will soon come home from college long enough to teach them how to work the computer and set the VCR.
In 1900, a father smoked a pipe.If he tries that today, he gets sent outside after a lecture on throat cancer.
In 1900, fathers shook their children gently and whispered, "Wake up, it's time for school."Today, kids shake their fathers violently at 4 a.m., shouting: "Wake up, it's time for baseball practice."
In 1900, a father came home from work to find his wife and children at the supper table.Today, a father comes home to a note: "Jimmy's at baseball, Cindy's at gymnastics, I'm at adult-Ed, Pizza in fridge."
In 1900, fathers and sons would have heart-to-heart conversations while fishing in a stream.Today, fathers pluck the headphones off their sons' ears and shout, "WHEN YOU HAVE A MINUTE..
"Daddy, Daddy, can I have another glass of water please?""But I've given you 10 glasses of water already!""Yes, but the bedroom is still on fire!"
What did the father ghost say to the naughty baby ghost?Spook when you're spooken to!
Why do golfers take an extra pair of socks?In case they get a hole in one!
How many ears did Davy Crockett have?Three: a left ear, a right ear, and a wild frontier!


Family Loop
Many, many years agoWhen I was twenty three,I got married to a widow,Pretty as could be.
This widow had a grown-up daughterWith flowing hair of red.My father fell in love with her,And soon the two were wed.
This made my dad my son-in-lawAnd changed my very life.Now my daughter was my mother,For she was my father's wife.
To complicate the matters worse,Although it brought me joy.I soon became the fatherOf a bouncing baby boy.
My little baby then becameA brother-in-law to dad.And so became my uncle,Though it made me very sad.
For if he was my uncle,Then that also made him brotherTo the widow's grown-up-daughterWho, of course, was my step-mother.
Father's wife then had a son,Who kept them on the run.And he became my grandson,For he was my daughter's son.My wife is now my mother's motherAnd it makes me blue.Because, although she is my wife,She's my grandma too.
If my wife is my grandmother,Then I am her grandchild.And every time I think of it,It simply drives me wild.
For now I have becomeThe strangest case you ever saw.As the husband of my grandmother,I am my own grandpa!
Dead Sea Gull
A father was at the beach with his children when his four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore, where a seagull lay dead in the sand.
"Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked. "He died and went to Heaven," the dad replied.
The boy thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him back down?"
Poor Preacher
After the church service a little boy told the pastor, "When I grow up, I'm going to give you some money.""Well, thank you," the pastor replied, "but why?""Because my daddy says you're one of the poorest preachers we've ever had."
Thunderstorm Company
One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice,"Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug."I can't dear," she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy's room."A long silence was broken at last by his shaking little voice:"The big sissy."
Going to DisneyLand
"Hey Grandpa!, can you make a noise like a frog?""I think I can do that. Why?""'Cuz Dad says when you croak, we're going to Disneyworld"
Letters
Dear Dad,
$chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply can't think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.
Love,Your $on-------------The Reply:--------------Dear Son,
I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.
Love,Dad
Why Parents Go Gray
The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employees home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered, "Hello?"Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, Is your Daddy home?"Yes", whispered the small voice."May I talk with him?" the man asked.To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?""Yes", came the answer."May I talk with her?"Again the small voice whispered, "no."Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?" the boss asked the child."Yes," whispered the child, "A policeman."Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked "May I speak with the policeman"?"No, he's busy," whispered the child."Busy doing what?" asked the boss."Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?""A hello-copper," answered the whispering voice."What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed.In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "Why are they there?"Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle:"They're looking for me."

Top ten things you'll never hear a dad say.
10. Well, how 'bout that? I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop and ask for directions.
9. You know Pumpkin, now that you're thirteen, you'll be ready for unchaperoned car dates. Won't that be fun?
8. I noticed that all your friends have a certain hostile attitude. I like that.
7. Here's a credit card and the keys to my new car. GO CRAZY!!
6. What do you mean you wanna play football? Figure skating's not good enough for you, son?
5. Your Mother and I are going away for the weekend. You might want to consider throwing a party.
4. Well, I don't know what's wrong with your car. Probably one of those doo-hickey thingies--ya know--that makes it run or something. Just have it towed to a mechanic and pay whatever he asks.
3. No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an earring. Now quit your belly-aching, and let's go to the mall.
2. Whaddya wanna go and get a job for? I make plenty of money for you to spend.
1. What do I want for my birthday? Aahh -- don't worry about that. It's no big deal. (Okay, they might say it. But they don't mean it)
Read the Label
A three-year-old boy went with his father to see a litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother that there were 2 boy kitties and 2 girl kitties."How do you know?" his mother asked."Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," he replied, "I think it's printed on the bottom."
Dad Lines
I figured out why they call our language the "Mother Tongue." Fathers never get a chance to use much of it.Say what you will about healthy eating and all, but I've always found it awfully difficult to explain to my son (who's 6'4" to my 6' in height), why junk food is bad for you.One time my kids wanted to surprise me with a good breakfast in bed on Father's Day. They put a cot in the kitchen.If you think about it, Adam had more trouble than any of the rest of us buying his Father a gift for Father's Day. I mean, what do you get somebody who's Everything?I started early teaching my kids the value of a dollar. From then on, they demanded their allowances in gold.
New and Improved
The little girl was sitting in her grandfather's lap as he read her a goodnight story. From time to time, she would take her eye's off the book and reach up to touch his wrinkled cheek. By and by she was alternately stroking her own cheek, then his again.Finally she spoke, "Granddaddy, did God make you?""Yes, sweetheart" he answered, "God made me a long time ago.""Oh she said," then "Granddaddy, did God make me too?""Yes, indeed honey" he assured her. "God made you just a little while ago.""Oh" she said. Feeling their respective faces again, she observed, "God's getting better at it now isn't he?"
Writing letters to son
The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny :
One student fell into a cycle of classes, studying, working and sleeping.Didn't realize how long he had neglected writing home until he received the following note:
"Dear Son, Your mother and I enjoyed your last letter. Of course, we were much younger then, and more impressionable. Love, Dad."
Helping your father
A clergyman walking down a country lane and sees a young farmer struggling to load hay back onto a cart after it had fallen off."You look hot, my son," said the cleric. "why don't you rest a moment, and I'll give you a hand.""No thanks," said the young man."My father wouldn't like it.""Don't be silly," the minister said."Everyone is entitled to a break. Come and have a drink of water."Again the young man protested that his father would be upset. Losing his patience, the clergyman said, "Your father must be a real slave driver. Tell me where I can find him and I'll give him a piece of my mind!""Well," replied the young farmer, "he's under the load of hay."
Your father is drunk
To The Tune Of Santa Claus Is Coming To Town
Oh you better not shout, you better not cry,You better not pout, I'm tellin' you why,Daddy's home and I think he's drunk.
He's walkin' real slow, he slurs when he speaks,I don't even think he's shaved in two weeks,Daddy's home and boy is he drunk,
He spent most of our money on Johnny Walker BlackAnd then he took all of the rest and lost it at the track.Sooooooo....
You better not pout, you better not cry,I don't like that look in his eye,Daddy's home and I think he's....Daddy's home and boy is he.......Daddy's home and he's really drunk!
What is his occupation?
A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. "Tim, you be first," she said. "What does your mother do all day?"Tim stood up and proudly said, "She's a doctor.""That's wonderful. How about you, Amie?"Amie shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman.""Thank you, Amie," said the teacher. "What about your father, Billy?"Billy proudly stood up and announced, "My daddy murders people, steals from them, and drinks."The teacher was aghast and promptly changed the subject to geography. Later that day she went to Billy's house and rang the bell. Billy's father answered the door. The teacher explained what his son had said and asked if there might be some logical explanation.Billy's father said, "I'm actually an attorney. But how can I explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"
Head goes to the bar
A man is waiting for wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion. After 21 years, the son is old enough for his first drink. Dad takes him to the bar and tearfully tells the son he is proud of him.
Dad orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol. Swoooop! A torso pops out!
The bar is dead silent; then bursts into a whoop of joy. The father, shocked, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant "Take another drink"! The bartender still shakes his head in dismay.
Swoooop! Two arms pops out. The bar goes wild. The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant, "Take another drink"! The bartender ignores the whole affair. By now the boy is getting tipsy, and with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it. Swoooop! Two legs pop out.
The bar is in chaos. The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God. The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left.... then to the right.... right through the front door, into the street, where a truck runs over him and kills him instantly.
The bar falls silent. The father moans in grief. The bartender sighs and says, "That boy should have quit while he was a head."


A student's request for extra money
A student called up his Mom one evening from his college and asked her for some money, because he was broke.His Mother said, "Sure, sweetie. I will send you some money. You also left your economics book here when you visited two weeks ago. Do you want me to send that up too?""Uhh, oh yeah, O.K." responded the kid.So his Mom wrapped the book along with the checks up in a package, kissed Dad goodbye, and went to the post office to mail the money and the book. When she gets back, Dad asked, "Well how much did you give the boy this time?""Oh, I wrote two checks, one for $20, and the other for $1,000.""That's $1020!!!" yelled Dad, "Are you going crazy???""Don't worry hon," Mom said, kissed Dad on the on top of his bald head, "I taped the $20 check to the cover of his book, but I put the $1,000 one somewhere between the pages in chapter 15!"
Just cut your hair first
A young man comes home and says "Dad, just got my driver's license and would like to use the family car."
Father replies, :"O.K., son. But, first, you have to get good grades in school, keep your room clean, make the yard is neat, and cut your hair. Come back in a few months and then we'll see."
Well, several months pass and the young man comes into the house with his report card in his hand. "Dad, I got great marks on my report card. I've been keeping my room as neat as a pin, and the yard is always ship-shape. How about letting me use the car?"
Father replies, "That's all true, but son you didn't cut your hair."
Son says, "But, dad, Jesus had long hair."
Father replies, "Yes, son, you're perfectly right. And he walked everywhere he went."

An honest lawyer
An independent woman started her own business. She was shrewd and diligent, so business kept coming in. Pretty soon she realized she needed an in-house counsel, and so she began interviewing young lawyers.
"As I'm sure you can understand," she started off with one of the first applicants, "in a business like this, our personal integrity must be beyond question." She leaned forward. "Mr. Peterson, are you an 'honest' lawyer?"
"Honest?" replied the job prospect. "Let me tell you something about honest. Why, I'm so honest that my dad lent me fifteen thousand dollars for my education and I paid back every penny the minute I tried my very first case."
"Impressive. And what sort of case was that?"
He squirmed in his seat and admitted, "My dad sued me for the money."
Subjects for a date
A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice.
The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy."
The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy's nervousness builds.
He remembers his father's advice, and chooses the first topic.
He asks the girl: "Do you like spinach?" She says "No," and the silence returns.
After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father's suggestion and turns to the second item on the list. He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again.
The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father's advice and asks the girl the following question: "If you had a brother, would he like spinach?"

Brag about parents
An Army brat was boasting about his father to a Navy brat.
"My dad is an engineer. He can do everything. Do you know the Alps?"
"Yes," said the Navy brat.
"My dad has built them."
Then the naval kid spoke: "And do you know the Dead Sea?"
"Yes."
"It's my dad who's killed it!"
Child sent to bed
A small boy is sent to bed by his father...
[Five minutes later]
"Da-ad..."
"What?"
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?"
"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
[Five minutes later]
"Da-aaaad..."
"WHAT?"
"I'm THIRSTY...Can I have a drink of water??"
"I told you NO! If you ask again I'll have to spank you!!"
[Five minutes later]
"Daaaa-aaaAAAAD..."
"WHAT??!!"
"When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?"

New family driver
Martin had just received his brand new drivers license. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them for a ride for the first time. Dad immediately heads for the back seat, directly behind the newly minted driver.
"I'll bet you're back there to get a change of scenery after all those months of sitting in the front passenger seat teaching me how to drive," says the beaming boy to his father.
"Nope," comes dad's reply, "I'm gonna sit here and kick the back of your seat as you drive, just like you've been doing to me all these years."
A parent's terrors of life
Dear Mother and Dad,
It has now been three months since I left for college. I have been remiss in writing and am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in not having written before. I will bring you up to date now, but before you read on, please sit down. You are not to read any further unless you are sitting down... Okay?
Well, then, I am getting along pretty well now. The skull fracture and the concussion I got when I jumped out of the window of my dormitory when it caught fire shortly after my arrival, are pretty well healed now. I only spent two weeks in the hospital and now I can see almost normally and only get three headaches a day.
Fortunately the fire in the dormitory and my jump were witnessed by an attendant at the gas station near the dorm and he was the one who called the Fire Department and the ambulance. He also visited me at the hospital, and since I had nowhere to live because of the burnt-out dorm, he was kind enough to invite me to share his apartment with him. It's really a basement room, but it is kind of cute. He is a very fine boy and we have fallen deeply in love and are planning to get married. We haven't set the exact date yet, but it will be before my pregnancy begins to show.
Yes, Mother and Dad, I am pregnant. I know how much you are looking forward to being grandparents and I know you will welcome the baby and give it the same love and devotion and tender care you gave me when I was a child. The reason for the delay in our marriage is that my boyfriend has some minor infection which prevents us from passing our premarital blood tests and I carelessly caught it from him. This will soon clear up with the penicillin injections I am now taking daily.
I know you will welcome him into our family with open arms. He is kind and although not well educated, he is ambtious. Although he is of a different race and religion than ours, I know you expressed tolerence will not permit you to be bothered by the fact that his skin color is somewhat darker than ours. I am sure you will love him as I do. His family background is good, too for I am told that his father is an important gunbearer in the village in Africa from which he comes.
Now that I have brought you up to date, I want to tell you that there was no dormitory fire, I did not have a concussion or skull fracture, I was not in the hospital, I am not pregnant, I am not engaged, I do not have syphillis and there is no boyfriend in my life. However, I am getting a "D" in History and an "F" in Science, and I wanted you to see these marks in the proper perspective.
Your loving daughter,Dorothy
Marriage quotes
Married life is full of excitement and frustration:* In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.* In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.* In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
It is true that love is blind but marriage is definitely an eye-opener.
Getting married is very much like going to the restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.
It's true that all men are born free and equal, but some of them get married!
There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found himself married. A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found himself divorced.
A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes.
Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad?Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it.
Son: Is it true? Dad, I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries.Father: That happens everywhere, son, everywhere!